Of Elephants and Humans: the Most Advanced Creatures of Earth's Biosphere
A lecture by the chief scientific officer of the Reptilian Starfleet, Meuianga Mera.
— Meuianga, what is this?
— It is unbelievable… What creatures are these?
— Strange, strange… they are Earthlings, right, but…
— The one with that enormous thing on the face. And the other with such a bulbous head. Eerie… What are you showing us, Meuianga?
— Cadets, cadets, I understand your perplexity. But I wanted to show you this image. Yes, they are Earthlings. You see here two of the dominant species of planet Earth. We already discussed a lot about the Earth’s biosphere, but I want to go a little more in depth about these two interesting species. They turn out to be the most advanced ones in the land biosphere On the left, you see one of those naked apes, also called humans. On the right, the creature called “elephant”.
— Yes, Meuianga. But we never saw these creatures together in this way.
— Exactly that, cadet Äawmlokun Te Aikxìn Wipipä'itan. There is a reason why I wanted to show you that image. Let me explain to you. Look first at the elephant. You see that huge protuberance? It is called a proboscis, it is an expanded nose, and it is a remarkably effective manipulation tool; all muscles and nerves, strong and delicate at the same time. You should see what these creatures can do with it.
— But those fangs, those on the side of that thing… the “proboscis— they are remarkably big.
— Ah, well, that’s not surprising, cadet. They are called “tusks” in the apes’ language. They use them to defend their proboscis; it is precious to them. So, they keep it safely between those two big tusks. It is a remarkable creature, unique in Earth’s biosphere. And I guess you can understand why it is so remarkable.
— Meuianga, I think I know what you mean. You were telling us about those creatures’ metabolism. Those Earth’s mammals…
— Yes, that thing, the proboscis; it has to be hugely expensive in metabolic terms!
— Good, cadets. It is good to hear that you understand what these lectures are about. We try to understand the reasons for these creatures being what they are. And, indeed, the proboscis is a highly expensive organ. But if they have it, it means they can afford it. These creatures have a fantastically efficient metabolic mechanism. I already told you about those big ears. They are cooling radiators; expensive, too. But it is all correlated. Elephants drink using their proboscis…
— What? Can they drink through their nose?
— No, no, cadet, they suck up water and then pour it into their mouths to drink.
— I wonder what it tastes like, Meuianga. I mean, after it has been in the nose...
— Because you are not an elephant, cadet Yeiimwey Te Itxpxoaw Kärepi'itan! But never mind that. The proboscis — in Earthling’s language, they also call it “trunk” — is a tool that’s both generated and generates a high metabolic rate. It can go up or down, and it allows the creature to feed both on the ground and from tree branches. It solves a bioengineering problem. Think of a large, herbivorous creature. If it has to reach the branches of tall trees — that’s called “browsing” — it has to have a long neck or long legs, or both things. But if the creature can reach high branches, it is hard for it to reach grass on the ground (it is called “grazing”). And if it can go high up, then it is hard for it to drink from a pool of water. You have seen one of those creatures with long legs and a long neck. They are called “giraffes” — interesting creatures, but they are not as efficient as elephants. Elephants have solved the problem. They use their trunk to reach both high branches and low grass on the ground. And they don’t risk breaking it because it has no bones inside. They are smart, efficient, and adaptable. Elephants are one of the two dominating species on land on planet Earth.
— Ah… that’s interesting, Meuianga, but didn’t you tell us that the dominating species was those naked apes?
— Yes, in a certain sense, cadet Yuimi Te Rìtxekä 'Äpi'ite. The naked apes, those “humans,” are dominating Earth’s lands in terms of numbers. There are about eight billion of them. Whereas there are only a few hundred thousand elephants left alive today…
— “Left alive,” Meuianga? What does that mean? Who killed them?
— The naked apes, cadets. They killed most of the elephants.
— The naked apes kill elephants? Why?
— I told you that they are a young species, very aggressive. And they are carnivores, like us. They eat elephants if they can kill them. And they are very efficient hunters. It is a subject that we’ll discuss, too. But that huge number of apes, well, that’s a temporary oscillation. The number of individuals in a species may show how efficient it is in the ecosystem. But things move and change all the time in ecosystems. Numbers go up and then crash down. This will soon be the destiny of the naked apes. But this is not what I wanted to tell you today. I wanted to let you notice something that elephants and humans have in common. Can you guess what it is?
— Well, Meuianga, you told us that these creatures have many special features.
— But they don’t have a proboscis!
— And not even large tusks!
— Of course, cadets. But think about that; there is at least one thing in common between humans and elephants. That’s why I showed you this image.
— Hmm… Meuianga, you told us a lot of things about these weird apes.
— But what do they have in common with elephants? Not so easy…
— But maybe, Meuianga, you told us that these elephants are smart. Didn’t you say that?
— Yes, cadet Yuimi. They are smart. They have a big brain. They must have it to control the complicated system of their proboscis.
— Ah….! That’s the trick, Meuianga. Big brains. They both have big brains. Just look at the bulbous head of the other creature in the image, the naked ape. It has to have a tremendous metabolic cost.
— Very good, cadets. You are advancing in your understanding of ecosystem science. Indeed the trick is the fast metabolic rate that both elephants and humans have. This high metabolic rate allows them to have big brains. Elephants use their brains to operate their proboscis and to create social groups. Humans do something similar. They use their big brains to make tools and to create social groups. They are both social species; they even collaborate with each other. I mean, humans and elephants.
— But, Meuianga, didn’t you tell us that the naked apes kill elephants?
— Yes cadet Syäeymäawtx Te Awakxuäzrraw Pozä'itan. But in some cases, they collaborate. They work together; they even fight together.
— Fight together? Amazing, Meuianga. How would they do that?
— Yes, cadets, they do. Not anymore, of course, but in ancient times elephants would help humans fight each other. An interesting story, but I’ll tell you about that another time. This lesson is about something else. So, can you guess how these species developed their high metabolic rate?
— You told us that both elephants and humans are mammals, right?
— Yes, they are. Indeed.
— But all mammals have similar metabolic metabolic mechanisms, right? Why should these creatures be different?
— It is not different, cadets. All Earth’s mammals have similar metabolic mechanisms. They breathe oxygen using those porous sacs they call “lungs,” and then they transport it to their mitochondria using their blood.
— But, Meuianga, that’s not different from what we reptilians do. We have mitochondria, too!
— Yes, but we can store oxygen in the Awkxpoesmä' as clathrate and use it when needed. Earth’s mammals can’t do that. Without oxygen, they can’t survive for more than a few minutes. But when they have oxygen, they do well. In favorable conditions, their metabolic rate is close to ours.
— Does that mean that the apes can’t travel in space?
— No, cadet Zeweypaypx Te Mìkxo'ä Mrrakx'itan. They have spaceships. Rather primitive ones, but they can travel to space as long as they have a pressurized space to live in. We Reptilians live in a vacuum, but eventually, we have to replenish our Awkxpoesmä' with oxygen. But that’s the point I am making today. These Earthlings, these “mammals,” have a metabolic ratio that depends on the relative pressure of oxygen and carbon dioxide. Their mitochondria work well if they have lots of oxygen around and not so much carbon dioxide. Their only supply of oxygen is their atmosphere; they fully depend on it.
— But, then, what does the atmospheric composition depend on?
— Ah… that’s the crucial question, cadet Atzeungkxä Te Äkpo Weraewi'ite. And it is the heart of your training in ecosystems. Let me show you something. It is the record of the concentration of carbon dioxide on Earth during the past 60 million Earth-years.
— Note that these measurements were made by the apes. Their scientists can be pretty clever, and they can do this kind of thing. Here, you see a long story but note just one point: the CO2 concentration has been at a minimum during the past few million years. It is due to a complex story of coupled biological and geological factors that we won’t examine right now. Just take this as a datum.
— But also, temperatures went down, right?
— Oh, yes, this is the result of the greenhouse effect. You studied that, right?
— Yes, Meuianga. It means that when it is cold, the ratio of oxygen to CO2 is higher. But I don’t see the oxygen in the graph.
— The data are uncertain, cadet, but let me show you the ratio.
See how it went up over the past 500 million years? It changed in favor of a higher oxygenation rate. It is as if, during the past few million years, the mammals of the biosphere had squeezed their oxygen clathrates to hyperoxygenate their metabolism. Then, natural selection kicked in, and the result is that some species can do things that no other species in Earth’s ecosystem could do before. Elephants with trunks and large ears and naked apes with their big, bulbous heads.
— Fascinating, Meuianga. But you told us that they don’t have our oxygen clathrate storage system. Does that mean they will develop it one day?
— They may. But right now, they are going in reverse. They are burning fossil hydrocarbons and pushing the atmospheric composition back to what it was long ago, with much more carbon dioxide.
— Oh.. that’s strange. You told us about this habit of theirs, that of burning fossil carbon. But we didn’t know its effect on their metabolic rate.
— Meuianga, does that mean they’ll become dumber?
— Probably yes, cadet Ngiprr Te Aymì Vawheyrol'itan. It is the way things are going down there, on Earth.
— But don’t they realize it? You told us that they are smart, those naked apes.
— Some of them do, but they don’t have the capability to react as a species. They lack our koren ayll, our benevolent and merciful governance system. But that may change in the future. They are a resourceful species, and they have surprised us more than once. But it might even happen that it will be the turn of elephants to rule the Earth! Anyway, I think I gave you enough food for thought for today. So, I leave you to your meditation session, and we’ll return to these matters next time. And may the Reptilian Federation rule the stars!
— May the Federation rule!
====================================================================
— Meuianga, excuse me…
— Yes…, cadet Yuimi Te Rìtxekä 'Äpi'ite.
— Can I ask you a question?
— Of course, you can.
— Meuianga… I listened to your lecture today. I think that there was more in it than what you told us.
— Explain your point, cadet.
— Meuianga, I don’t know how to say that…
— Cadet, speak your mind. I am your officer, and I will try to help you if I can.
— Meuianga. Those two figures you showed to us. The female ape and the elephant… They were not realistic images of living creatures, right?
— It is a correct observation, cadet Yuimi. Please, continue.
— They had a meaning that I cannot fully grasp, Meuianga, but that’s upsetting me. Maybe you think I am a bad cadet, but…
— No, cadet Yuimi. Your reaction is not wrong. Indeed, I was expecting that some members of your class would perceive that.
— Perceive what, Meuianga?
— That this image doesn’t show Earthly creatures.
— This I do not understand, Meuianga. Please, explain.
— It will take time for you to understand, cadet. But these images are avatars of two deities.
— Deities? What does that mean?
— Otherworldly creatures. They are the Goddess Gaia and the God Ganesha.
— You told us something about these entities. This “God,” isn’t it something like a giant ape that lives in the sky?
— It is much deeper and more complex than a big ape in the sky. I think you looked carefully enough at the image that you became permeated by its meaning. But you have to be careful. These are not things we can discuss in public — please don’t speak with your comrades about that. It is something we are still studying. Let’s just say that these humans have channels allowing them to perceive entities that we Reptilians don’t seem to be able to perceive. We don’t really know, but it occurs at a level that goes beyond sensorial perception. These images are avatars of entities that may be just hallucinations of the apes’ brains. Or much more than that.
— Meuianga, I understand what you say, and I will keep your words to myself. But I have to say one thing about the female ape in the image. She’s incredibly beautiful.
— Not just that, cadet. Gaia is also benevolent and merciful. She is the sum of all the creatures of this planet. She embodies their form, their essence, their power, and everything. And the elephant, Ganesha, is a representation of the order of the universe.
— I am in awe, Meuianga. Who made this image?
— A friend of mine, cadet.
— A “friend”, Meuianga? What does it mean? Something like a nest sibling? But the apes are not born from eggs. I figure not even those… “elephants” are born from eggs.
— Cadet Yuimi, among these apes you don’t need to be born from eggs deposited in the same nest to be nest siblings. It is something like kinship. Like we are all troopers of the Reptilian Starfleet. And we respect each other, and we help each other. It is the way to be a good Reptilian. But this is something you know. But it can be more; it may mean a sexual partner.
— Sexual partner? But what do you mean, Meuianga?
— I mean exactly that, cadet Yuimi. Our mirage suits can change the structure of our bodies and make the apes perceive us as fellow apes. Friends, I mean. Even in the sense I mentioned before.
— Meuianga…
— Cadet Yuimi. You look strange. Are you all right?
— Yes, I am, Meuianga. I lost contact with the world for a moment. You have to excuse me if I pump some more oxygen from my Awkxpoesmä'… But did you tell me that you did… I mean, with one of these apes…?
— A good Reptilian scientist must try many things, cadet Yuimi, don’t you agree with me?
— Yes Meuianga. I do agree with you. Maybe one of these days… see, you could, perhaps…
— Keep your mirage suit ready, cadet Yuimi. One of these days, we’ll beam down to Earth together! And you’ll see things that you Reptilians couldn’t even imagine.
— I am looking forward to that, Meuianga. And may the Reptilian Federation rule!
— May the Federation rule with mercy and benevolence!
Very cute story Ugo. Lord Ganesha (spelling?) Is known as the "remover of obstacles" . I would like to have him pay a visit to some of our oil companies.
i thought the limits to growth stated collapse in 2030 and that the new report of the club of rome did give us a window to 2030 to avoid collapse but now you say soon we will collapse so next year it can all by over then ?